an experience with others when time stands still. It is a time full of the present, when the past is left behind and the future is set aside. It is a special time of focused attention and heightened awareness. Interruptions and distractions are consciously excluded.
Do you know the theory of the multiverse?
As per this theory, our universe is just one place in the void. There can be an infinite number of other universes.
This means that there can be infinite chances that other planets in other planetary ecosystems have life like our earth has.
There are conspiracy theories that if you travel through black holes, you can reach other parallel worlds.
Want to try it? Maybe Elon Musk will be ecstatic to help you.
Research says that Deja Vu incidents are the proof of the existence of parallel worlds.
You might have felt like some random non-deliberate incidents have happened already in the past and the same things are happening again. Deja Vu incidents usually stay for very short time periods, maybe a few seconds. You feel like the surroundings, incidents and happenings are all very familiar as if they happened before; though they have not happened.
It is said that such events happen when ‘YOU’ in this world and another version of ‘YOU’ in a parallel universe are doing the same thing at the same time at the same place. So, both of you are SYNCHRONISED.
Now the chance for both ‘YOU’s to live a similar life is statistically very minimal, but it still happens. – This is one explanation of Deja Vu.
Anyway, the point of telling all these is that, whatever you can think of, is possible in the multiverse.
But not in this world.
There are some limits to imagine in our world.
Some people only believe in hard facts. Some are always blind to acknowledge the facts and both types are idiots.
There should be a healthy balance between reality and imagination to have good mental peace.
Because, when you are always checking the facts, then you are actually confining yourself and limiting your thoughts and when you do that, you are always reluctant to be open to new thinking.
So called scientific facts are much inferior to the secrets of the Universe. This is because science is very limited to prove everything and even if it proves something, it often hides it due to political reasons.
As an example, some of you never believe in the existence of ghosts. You either say that it’s rubbish in the 21st century or you say that you don’t believe it as you have never seen one. Who might say, maybe someone (or something) is watching you from behind while you read this book.
On the other hand, when you are always reluctant to accept general scientific knowledge, you stay ignorant.
When I was in school, there was a story in our textbook. It was about how a bunch of superstitious people started to worship a random stone found on the road. It was a Bengali story called ‘Birth of a New God’ [translation from Bengali- Debotar Jonmo] by a famous author Shibram Chakraborty.
Author saw how one day a random pedestrian saw a stone lying beside the road and that pedestrian took that stone and put it under a clean basement under a tree. The next day, the author saw that some people had applied vermilion (Sindoor in Indian language) and put some flowers in front. Then after a few days the author was shocked to see how one priest had set up his tools and literally worshipped the stone. People were gathering, praying and donating money.
In Hinduism, people pray to idols and stones and the rest of the world criticises Hinduism for that and accuses them of inferior spirituality.
IN ACTUAL, the Hindus don’t pray to just any random objects. Whatever object it is, be it a stone or an idol, it is an icon for them to represent a higher energy which is infinite.
And the objects they worship have specific significance. As an example, in Hinduism, people worship banyan [Ficus benghalensis] trees. Do you know the reason?
The reason is- all trees emit oxygen (O2) at day and carbon-di-oxide (CO2) at night. So, people have risks of inhaling CO2 and dying if they sleep under trees at night. The only exception is banyan trees, which emit O2 at night as well and thus is a safe place to rest for humans.
Hindus worship Banyan trees to show respect and gratitude towards such greatness.
In similar ways, Tulsi/Basil [Ocimum tenuiflorum] is a cure for 100s of diseases and thus it is valued. It is symbolised as God Narayana but it is not totally baseless.
In maths, when we represent Infinite, we use the symbol ‘∞’.
The concept of infinite says that something is bigger than the biggest thing you can think of. So, you can’t actually think of anything infinite (duh!!). it is untouchable and incomprehensible.
But the symbol ‘∞’ is quite finite. You can see it, write it or even utter the word ‘infinite’. Here we are representing something superior with a mere icon.
When you are relying on only science or only imagination, you remain ignorant.
But when you understand the science behind imagination, you attain higher mental peace. I have explained this in the chapter of Manifestation in detail.
However, it is not easy to attain. Being able to separate reality from imagination tends to require maturity.
The first step to accept realistic imagination is to understand that you don’t know much and then start keeping an open mind.
This is why sometimes; prayers can cause miracles sometimes. We will discuss this too at some time.
Imagination and realism are two different poles and both do not need each other to exist. But if they do, the combination may be infinitely powerful.
The more you know facts, the more conscious you become and the more you imagine based on those facts. It actually hurts your brain and this is the curse of knowledge.
But some of you will choose this. One way to be conscious is to ask with ‘why’.
‘Why do you actually do what we do?’
‘Why does it actually happen as it happens?’
WHY-WHY-WHY
‘WHY’ is a powerful word. But unfortunately, or fortunately, science does not have a large majority of answers and surprisingly, sometimes, imagination will let you find that answer.
The level of facts and imagination also vary based on time, place and people.
When you were born, you had no idea of worshipping or religion.
Then your parents teach you to pray and make it a habit when you are a kid.
And then you grow up, reach teenage and face some hardships of life. You choose to stop praying as your prayers are not answered.
Later when you become old and sick, you plead to a higher entity to give your relief.
Then you lose your memory.
Back to square one.
Honestly, it does not matter if you don’t pray to God or pray to God.
It’s a personal choice. Just don’t force others to follow your views.
Don’t try to find evidence with biasedness at all times- modern science does not have all answers.
And …
Don’t try to imagine with biasedness all the time- it keeps you ignorant.
What you should try to do is to explore different verticals to establish a better fate than what you have faith in now.
Life is almost always about self-exploration. So, explore yourself rather than negating others.
Whenever someone tells me that he or she is an atheist, I smile. Because at some point of their lives, they will 100% start believing in the presence of a higher entity.
It does not mean that they will throw flowers at God’s idols. But deep down, they will have faith in the superior force to attain mental peace.
On the other hand, actually I haven’t personally met anyone who only relies on imagination.
Modern day radical feminists might have a high-level imagination. They never see the facts that go in favour of women. This induces toxicity and they fail.
The bottom line is, when you have a realistic imagination, you are more open minded and you know more secrets.
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It is more important to use that anger to create something.
Anger, itself, is not very good for health. It affects your physical and mental health.
So, you better use it wisely to make it worthwhile.
Here is a cheat sheet of anger management in different scenarios:
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Always remember that anger gets suppressed with time. But you can reduce the duration of painfulness by being consciousness.
Every time you get angry, you have to identify that you are angry and then take suitable actions.
Place, Time and Person are three important things. You can’t treat everyone similarly every time and in every scenario. Be adaptable.
Forgiving and ignoring are the most neutral and useful way to manage anger. They are better than complaining.
Anger is an important thing in life. Sometimes, it accelerates you towards the correct direction.
Sometimes it is better to hit hard rather than tolerating sh*t.
If you can do something, do it or else keep calm. Don’t whine.
You have the power.
You have control over the situation.
You have enough strength already.
You also have self-control.
Though I have given you so many lectures, I, myself, am often an angry person. Whenever things are not going smoothly for me, I become angry and I would not say that I get angry for no reason.
The purpose of your daily life should be to spend the day smoothly without any anger or tension. So, you have to try to do necessary things for that.
But one thing I would say is that anger is, in most cases, a temporary emotion. The situation that makes you angry is likely to get resolved or fade away within some time. It can be a few minutes, hours, months or even a few years. Even India was under foreign suppression for about 200 years before it got its freedom.
So, learn to channel anger to reduce that time frame. Above, I gave you a few cheats but I did not give you a detailed analysis. Simply because there can be numerous scenarios under each of the points mentioned above. You have to use your basic understanding and cognitive ability to handle the situation.
Being angry is not a bad thing as most people say. Actually, you need to be angry…. Feel that emotion. Then understand the reason and control the reason to manage the anger.
And if you are absolutely reluctant to get angry, ask yourself: Are you so weak that you let someone else destroy your inner mental peace?? Are you that weak?
Life is always about knowing about yourself.
Learn from your life when to be angry and when not to be angry.
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Out of the non-distinguishing primordial soup of Bose-Einstein Condensate – after the big bang, emerged riding the arrow of time; an entangled symphony of a spectra of fundamental particles that would interrelatedly constitute all of reality and derivatively, form the basis of the standard model as we know it today. The standard model is widely considered to be our greatest achievement as a species in the spread that we have inhabited for the eons. It describes the reality we are embedded within and are made up of with great accuracy and allows us to make predictions with a very high resolution of specificity. How did we get here though?
How did a collection of fragile, curious hominids; outcasted by the great CHLCAs away from the safety of trees – to venture into the unforgivingly hostile savannahs, survive long enough to come to spur adaptations that would not just allow them to uncover the raw materials of design but also to shape and transform their cosmic backyard into a cradle for a thriving civilization that spans the entire globe and is beginning to take decisive steps toward propagating itself way beyond Carl Sagan’s ‘pale blue dot’?
Human beings have emerged victorious over the seething existential challenges of prehistory. What allowed us to do so, is us. We as a people of now, belong to an unbroken chain of individuals that beat insufferable environmental odds and had had to slay massive archetypal dragons within the backwaters of their psyches in order for us to be here.
We as a species have differentiated ourselves from the vast diversity of the biosphere through our collective choices and actions in conjunction with the environment in an unprecedented set of adaptations. We adapted to walk upright on twos disposing us with the ability to see from above the blockade of tallgrass; allowing us a better capacity to apprehend predators and prey, we traded some of the vast short-term memory faculty of our cousin apes with the capacity to communicate using symbols; forming the basis for language and most importantly we developed a larger cortex that allowed for us to develop reasoning.
Reasoning originally evolved, only to serve a social function; it allowed for us to unite under shared, cooperative plans of action to better improve our odds at success in hunting, managing scarce resources, and diffusing conflict within tribes together. Reasoning set us free from the behavioristic constraints of stimulus – response that all other species of animals are deterministically confounded within.
With reasoning, we had the ability to have better, more abstract cognition and; the ability to mitigate and harness our cognition as a force for progress. It wouldn’t be a far shot to say that reasoning and its unfolding is exactly what caused us as human beings to shape ourselves into a collective corpus of ‘people’ within a constituting civilization; a far cry from the savage beasts we used to be – living on hunt to hunt.
Reasoning as the ages progressed, proliferated our ability to conjecture or the capacity to generate explanatory hypotheses for phenomena we observed. This marked the beginning of knowledge creation; the very faculty that spurred the inception of the enlightenment era and through forming the basis of science, got us to the landmark of development we represent as a civilization today. For the first time in 4 billion years, since the first self-replicating RiboNucleic Acid molecule initiated the spark of life – had an organism transcended the evolutionary trend of all species eventually evolving into the arbitrary conditions of their extinction relative to the whims of nature.
For the first time a creature circumvented the conditions of natural selection and manifested the capacity to not have to be governed by the caprices of its environment. Conjecture and the shared epistemological structure that it gave rise to – as good explanations accrued; allowed us as a collective the power to shape our environment and bypass natural selection in our favor. We began to rely less and less on luck and more and more on our volition.
People as masters of their own fate in the future is an idea that is deeply empowering to some of us while others among us see it as a grossly reprehensible proposition. Both of these notions are based on their corresponding and opposing views of the fundamental nature of people and how special we are in the context of the universe. The German philosopher Fredrick Nietzche is known among other things for conceptualizing the idea of the ‘Ubermensch’ or ‘Superman’.
The Ubermensch represents future ideal individuals who could create their own values and impose them upon the world and most importantly themselves. While such a view is sufficiently tantalizing to stir our collective fantasies and optimism; there have been prominent thinkers among us who have expressed reservation in being overly optimistic and grandiose about the importance and ability of people in the expansive backdrop of the cosmos. Physicist Stephen Hawking has described humanity to be merely chemical scum on a moderately sized planet; expounding a vision of our cosmic insignificance.
The originator of the psychoanalytic school of thought, Sigmund Freud; in his seminal work, ‘Civilization and Its Discontents’ expressed the view that civilization is but a framework that we have built as a means of keeping each other’s darkest, most aggressive impulses under check and that people, as a consequence shall be doomed to never experience contentment; since true contentment can only be ours when we express our deepest, darkest, most destructive desires – which civilization is built to prevent. French philosopher Jean-Paul Satre has portrayed the idea of ‘hell’ being nothing else but ‘other people’ in his play ‘No Exit’.
Several climate-concerned thinkers have likened people to cancer on the planet due to the negative impact of our actions on the ecology; specifically, ozone depletion, ocean pollution, depletion of flora & fauna, and global warming. The problem according to many of these people is overpopulation, which taxes the carrying capacity of the earth and its natural resources.
If one is to affix any import to these views, then one would find themselves compelled to ask questions such as: Is there anything then that makes people special? Are we truly just nothing but environmentally cancerous discontent chemical scum destined to cumulatively embody each other’s hell? If so, then is our capacity to transform our environment in such masterful ways even a testament to anything unique, or is it just a ‘spandrel’ or the product of a mutation responsible for our reasoning ability that was never intended to have the reach of influence that we have ended up trying to overextend it to; in order to construct a narrative of ourselves that is meant to convince us of the delusion of our significance? The good news is, that there is consensus that things might just be better than that.
Proponents and supporters of the strong anthropic principle in theoretical physics are ardently in favor of the idea that the universe and its constants seem to be fine-tuned in such improbable configurations that they would be optimal for intelligent life to emerge; specifically in order for the form of intelligent life that we represent to come about. They believe that us coming about and embodying our collective natures as human beings is not random in any way and that the potential for that to happen is encoded as the very ultimate goal of the universe. In other words, the universe exists the way in which it does specifically so ultimately, we can come to exist in the way we do. This view is starkly against the perception that we are merely insignificant and random emergent phenomena. It purports in fact that we are the very ultimate reason for the universe to exist in the first place.
The probability of this perspective being true is encapsulated by ‘The Fermi Paradox’ which points out the fact that despite various conservative estimates of high probability, there seems to be no apparent evidence of any extraterrestrial life existing anywhere else in the universe. If the universe genuinely is buzzing with extraterrestrial life as traditional estimates would have led us to believe, then how come we have never seen any signs of that being the case? This points to the possibility that life itself and more so we are way rarer than we usually assume. This paradox lends itself as the foundation for the notion of ‘the great filter’.
The great filter stands for the idea of an arbitrary set of pervasive limitations that prevent any civilization from increasing in number and development to the extent of becoming an interstellar civilization. This has been cited as one of the possible reasons why no other extraterrestrials have made it so far. They may have been obliterated by the great filter before they could live to reach out to us and tell us their tale. The limitations for a civilization as sufficiently advanced as ours could only be us turning on ourselves.
We have capable technology to deal with most natural disasters and divert or destroy any threats from space such as asteroids from escalating into extinction events. The only thing remaining for us to fear is our own destructive inclinations that could for example cause our own demise through an all-out nuclear war or some similar catastrophe.
Many statistical projections, however, give us ample reason to believe that the times of worry have already passed; that the great filter may indeed already be behind us. A landmark report from the United Nations Department of Economic and Social Affairs has predicted that the world population of people will peak at 9.22 Billion in 2075 and then stabilize at 9 billion. This projection decisively refutes any robust basis for holding misanthropic views such as one equating people with cancer. The planet has more than sufficient resources to be able to sustain 9 billion of us – which is not a huge leap in numbers away from where we are already at; for a very, very long time.
Other studies have shown that there seems to be a direct link between the increase in environmental concern in a nation with the increase in it’s Gross Domestic Product (GDP). With world GDP showing a steady increase over more than the past decade, we are left with every reason to believe that with this trend continuing in the future more and more people as they are lifted out of the shackles of poverty will be inclined to live in an environmentally conducive way.
As that happens, there is every chance that we not only could reverse the damage we have done to the oceans and the biosphere so far, but we also could come up with methods of sustainable living that would benefit animals and plants symbiotically. We could also reverse climate change in the process.
Beyond our projections placing us favorably in relation to our future; there are facts that stand as testimony to the truly, deeply special nature of our beings. The exemplary reach of our knowledge is instantiated by our capacity to intentionally cause outcomes to come about that nature itself has difficulty producing. We can observe an example of this in physicist Wolfgang Ketterle’s lab at the Massachusetts Institute of Technology in Cambridge.
Ketterle and his colleagues were able to bring down the temperature of a cloud of sodium molecules to 810 trillionths of a degree Fahrenheit above absolute zero in 2008. This is far below the naturally occurring coldest place in the universe called The Bow Tie Nebula with a temperature of 1 Kelvin. This makes a part of Ketterle’s lab officially the coldest place in the universe. No other form of animate or inanimate matter in the entire universe could bring about such outcomes but us.
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With the optimists among us casting enough apportions for us to hold reasonable doubts on the notions of our being insignificant, un rare, and a permanent liability to the environment; the only aspects left for us to proactively redeem are those that have to do with our moral behavior. The source of our capacity to be moral lies in our tribe instinct. Human Beings, being the fundamentally social animals we are, come hardwired with the desire to go beyond ourselves and help others. This moral nexus lies within each and every one of us.
However, the better angels of our nature are not always accessible to us. So often we are so riddled with our personal troubles and ambitions that we override our natural instinct for altruism and commit acts of moral transgressions that make thinkers like Satre see other people as embodiments of hell and make Freud see civilization as merely a failsafe for our worst tendencies. It’s no secret that people are capable of tremendous malevolence and evil. Throughout the world and throughout history people have committed heinous atrocities on each other.
History is littered with wars, genocide, torture, rape, racial subjugation, and merciless killings. No other species on the planet has manifested a propensity for such violence. The tribe instinct that was organically meant to unify us through a shared system of moral values has degenerated into the worst form of divisive tribalism over the course of history. If we are to truly take heed of the great filter being behind us; we’d have to do better than that. We would have to come up with ways of reunifying the thorough diversity that we represent under the umbrella of a universally agreed-upon standard of positive regard for every individual.
We would have to reconceptualize the fundamental pillars of the function of civilization. We would have to choose a social order that is more tolerant and more facilitative of individuals using society as a tool for integrating both the desirable and despicable aspects of themselves in a healthy way into their personalities; so the undesirable aspects don’t have to find their expression in violence. The idea of a unifying standard of regard is not so we could inoculate away our differences but so we could express our differences in the most productive possible way – both for ourselves and our fellow human beings. In some ways, it is about rediscovering every individual as the nexus of transcendent good and encouraging every individual to strive for their own inner calling of the highest moral integrity they can abide by.
This cannot truly come about until we eradicate the roots of practices and ideology that continue to perpetuate racism, sexism, casteism, ageism, prejudice, and arbitrary intolerance of any other kind. If we could truly do these things among other things, then one day we could triumphantly proclaim victory over the call of the abyss. If and when we reach such a state of existence, we would have confidently dealt with the only thing standing between us and the stars – ourselves. This implies a form of hopeful optimism that some may consider idealistic. However, this may be the only way the future of humanity can sustain its drive for expansion and progress without buckling in on itself and falling prey to decay from nihilism and self-destructiveness.
We the people are the only lifeform to have ever existed who can be aware of their own existential predicaments. We are the only species within the animal kingdom whose every single individual is capable of exhibiting a virtually unique constellation of beliefs and traits and is capable of making a significant difference in the world around them. We are the only species capable of expressing profound mercy and kindness beyond each other to all other forms of life, that we share the planet with.
We are the only form of self-replicating matter that can: perceive and behold beauty, that can express moral virtues such as honesty, compassion, fidelity, justice, and temperance; that can derive ‘an ought from an is’ or moral injunctions from facts as philosopher David Hume once put it, that can cause and regulate its own behavior and that can shape its own experiences. We are the only configuration of life that often lays itself in harm’s way for the sake of others of its own kind. With the universe expanding rapidly and the rate of its expansion accelerating – as was observed through the Hubble telescope; we may end up being the only conscious entities that are lucky enough to exist in a time when the sky is full of light from distant stars that we can observe and draw inferences of knowledge from.
As the universe expands and galaxies drift apart from each other there will come a time when future observers would look up into the sky and all they would see is blank darkness because the expansion of the universe would have accelerated to such an extent that it would be impossible for light from distant galaxies to ever reach us. We may be a panpsychist universe’s only way of becoming aware of itself and the mechanics of its own workings. We as a collective are beginning to wake up to the responsibility that has been ordained to us by an anthropocentric universe to pursue and fulfill our latent potential and as a result, transform the landscape of matter were born in, into a landscape of meaning that we bestow upon the structures of the universe as we explore and potentially colonize them.
We are learning to get out of our way and to climb on each other’s shoulders. We, the curious hominids of planet earth have come very far; from stone tools to supercomputers. With landmark social reforms, we have begun unshackling ourselves from our limiting behaviors of the past and thus, we are learning to be our own best friends rather than our own worst enemies. We are shaking off the entitlement of being exceptional and replacing it with the humbleness and wisdom of being the endowed ones.
Rather than allowing ourselves to be engulfed by the daunting chaos of entropy, we are magnifying our responsibility to encompass the sustained search for truth. There has never been and probably will never be a pattern of arrangement of atoms that can do what we do and come to know what we know. So, when cynicism has us ask, ‘Why us?’. We must affirm, ‘if not us then who?’.
Freud, S. (1930). Civilization and its discontents. Hogarth.
Nietzsche, F. W., & Kaufmann, W. (1995). Thus spoke Zarathustra: A book for all and none. New York: Modern Library.
Sagan, C., Druyan, A., Soter, S., Malone, A., Weidlinger, T., Haines-Stiles, G., Kennard, D., … Polytel International. (2000). Cosmos: A personal voyage. Studio City, CA: Cosmos Studios.
Pigeon, C. (2012). Hume on Is and Ought | Issue 83. Philosophy Now. https://philosophynow.org/issues/83/Hume_on_Is_and_Ought#:%7E:text=1*)%20You%20can%E2%80%99t,conclusions%20from%20non%2Dmoral%20premises.&text=b)%20that%20since%20moral%20judgments,%E2%80%99%20or%20fact%2Dstating
Sartre, J.-P., (1955) No exit, and three other plays. New York: Vintage Books.
https://www.goodreads.com/quotes/523470-the-human-race-is-just-a-chemical-scum-on-a
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Another case of blind trust is the downfall of Ukraine in the Russia-Ukraine war in 2022.
To understand this, you have to understand the reason for the war. I will give you an analogy.
Suppose you live in your house with your children and there are 4 more houses around you. All are living peacefully, now your ex-partner arrives in the locality and befriends your neighbours. You have had serious fights with this abusive partner who has criminal records as well.
The ex-partner wants to spy on you and for that spy-cameras have been installed in the neighbours’ houses. You are aware that that person has criminal records. In this position, will you believe the person even if he says that he is harmless? Are you even willing to take your chance?
In this analogy, you are Russia, the ex-partner is the US and the neighbour is Ukraine and other countries like Poland. When I say ‘country’, it indicates the government and the top authorities. Normal citizens are powerless. For the past many years, Russia has asked USA and entities like NATO, EU, UN to not to spy on Russia. But the US kept installing armoires and nuclear missiles beside the Russian borders.
In addition to that, the USA kept expanding in the Eastern Europe through NATO. NATO was formed after the cold war (1991) during the breakdown of the Soviet Union and in the last 2 decades, NATO has allied with Bulgaria, Croatia, Estonia, Latvia, Lithuania, Romania, Slovakia, Slovenia, Montenegro and North Macedonia. And most of these are neighbouring countries of Russia.
Even after the Soviet Union’s breakdown Russia and its neighbours were living peacefully, but then USA and NATO kept coming to these neighbours and promised different aids if they let the US install nuclear weapons in those countries with intention to keep an eye on Russia. After the fall of the Soviet Union, many of the small countries were having financial issues so they fell into the trap of NATO’s expansion strategy. Russia gets no security guarantee. Plus, Russia had war bases in Crimea and Syria, where the US invaded as well in 2014 and 2015 respectively.
Now, the reason the heat between Russia and Ukraine started to increase because president Zelensky ‘supposedly’ committed a genocide on 14000 Russians in Donbass. Also, Ukraine showed interest in joining NATO with the intention to get protection. As per the NATO treaty, if a country gets into NATO and any of these countries are attacked, then all NATO countries will attack the attacker country. So, this was a serious threat to Russia and to protect its sovereignty, Russia declared war on Ukraine.
Now, the aspect of blind trust is coming here because Ukraine did not get any help from NATO. Yes, countries like USA, France, UK etc gave some financial and weapon support but no major support was provided. There are multiple reasons for this, one is- all countries are afraid of nuclear warfare. Russia has nuclear weapons plus backups from Eastern countries and they will not back off if NATO countries throw missiles at them. Another reason is that a lot of countries are actually getting benefitted from this war. Countries like the US have weapon factories and they are selling more weapons to many countries. As Ukraine’s economy plunges, many other countries are getting rich. Ukraine’s president Zelensky had blind faith in NATO and a whole country is suffering.
I am not justifying the war, innocent people are suffering but I am against the double-standards of western countries’ governments. And it is not any surprise, the top authorities and governments of any country are SUPPOSED to be power hungry to build their aggression. This is politics and this has been since the early age, any type of invasions are the burning proof of this statement.
You might feel that it is wrong, but the world does not care about your feelings and you don’t have any control BECAUSE you lack political power. The only way to stop corruption is to build a community of vigilantes who possess high economic power.
Another reason for Ukraine’s misery is the peoples’ blind faith in the president. Zelensky has been a comedian and actor in his early life. He lacks political knowledge. And movies are different from reality. A leader should always try to protect the citizens but Zelensky is giving inspirational dialogues and influencing normal citizens to fight armies.
I agree that persuasion is one important trait for leaders and the way Zelensky is fighting back, is appreciable but it is not giving much upper hand to Ukraine. In May 2022, when I am writing this, the war is still on and Russia has the advantage. I feel sorry for the Ukrainian citizens but now we know the consequences of a bad leadership. “When a clown becomes a king, the downfall of a kingdom becomes inevitable” [Turkish Proverb]. Zelensky’s lack of political knowledge has made him a mere pawn in the actual war between Russia and USA and some other major countries.
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Blind trust in political scenarios can cause destruction of a society.
During my MBA, I did an assignment on employment issues in India. The question was ‘Why is there employment issues in India’ and I found two main reasons-
Why is there an education-skill gap-
Why is there a rat race?
Why is the pass mark low?
Power Hunger in politics has been there from the start since Nehru became the prime minister. Every political party plays the blaming-game and brainwashes the young mind.
Young people are not made aware of this fact that they are being brainwashed.
The ineffective education system implemented during British rule removed critical thinking from the Indian mindset. Children are not taught to think critically.
The reason why colonisation happened in the first place is the concept of ‘Athithi Debo Bhava’…. It is followed by books.
If Vasco Da Gama had been stopped in the first place, no Portuguese Inquisition would have happened in Goa. I learned about this horrific incident from Shefali Vaidya and a Bengali book by Nilanjan Sarkar ‘14e February’. And believe me, the torture done by Portuguese is 1000x worse than British torture.
F*ck ‘Atithi Debo Bhava’.
Our ancestors have always been polite and they did not stand up for themselves at the right time.
Siraj-Ud-Daulla was the last free Nawab of India. He ruled in Murshidabad, West Bengal in India. He declared war against the British when Britishers wanted to claim Bengal. But his commander Mirzafar betrayed him to get benefits from Britishers. Siraj fled from the battle to save his life but got caught. The Britishers were taking him to the prison and the citizens were standing beside the road.
One British police officer shared that experience. He said that there were so many people that if each of them threw just one pebble at them, they all would have been buried under a mountain.
But the citizens remained silent spectators. They are afraid to protest.
We suffered for too long and many are still suffering. Inquisition still happens in Assam, Kerala, West Bengal.
On the other hand, why is Industrialisation stopped?
The reasons why manufacturing industries are low are:
But the scenario is improving little by little these days
India will become glorious soon with all these. But there is still much path to walk to reach a glorious stage, awareness is the only thing that can change the mindset. We need to analyse critically and make good decisions.
WAKE UP!!
Gen Y and Gen Z need to fucking wake up. Because Boomers and Gen X are too old to change their mindset now. Gen Y and Z need to teach Gen A.
Don’t fall into the trap of the educational system.
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Blind trust has f*cked up more people than you can think of.
Be it in personal life, professional life, political scenario or overconfidence.
In your personal life, you may blindly trust your family members. Better to say that you are told to blindly trust your family members, neighbours etc. But it feels shit when we read about these so-called ‘dear ones’ molesting children, irrespective of gender.
Children should be taught to not trust anyone blindly and ask questions with genuine interest. They should be taught how to protect themselves by critically analysing the situations when they are alone. It might be suitable to teach them combat skills or just to shout when in danger. This sounds harsh, but it is necessary. Children need not be naïve. And this is a parenting guide for you.
Most parents don’t have these types of thoughts in mind because when they were young, these types of paedophilic activities might not have been too much. But somehow, such activities have increased and it is utterly disgusting.
It scars the children their whole lives and affects their mental health. I am not any researcher in this, but with my peanut-size brain I can understand at least this much.
On the other hand, often children and teenagers are told to trust blindly.
Not to question the elderly people.
Not to think on their own.
Just to do what is told to do.
However, this is not a stereotype. Some parents do teach children about this and make them aware. And more of this is needed.
Parents should not depend on schools. Children consider their parents or guardians as their first teachers and it is the parents’/guardians’ duty to keep them safe and make them aware.
In your personal life, you may blindly trust your partner or lover. Blind trust makes you biased. Suppose you blindly trust your wife and she is behaving badly with your parents behind your back. Even if your parents complain to you about this, you are unlikely to take any proper action against your partner. Your partner may lie about this too, taking advantage of the situation. Your parents will lose trust in you. Are you willing to let this happen?
Feel free to love but keep an open mind and aware brain. Also, too much love is suffocating. It reduces personal space between people. And after some time, one person loses attraction. Personal space is necessary in a relationship.
Personal space is more necessary than compromising in a relationship. Compromising is more necessary than love in a relationship.
To keep a small note, compromising is when you don’t like something in the other person but still manage to live with it for a better relationship. It’s like when you say ‘I will accept you however you are’ and actually do that.
Dating 2 times per week is one thing; living 24×7 under the same roof is another world. Because when you go on a date, either or both of you show off your best use-cases. When you live together, you get to know the boring parts. This is why the rate of divorce increased during Covid lockdown period. People don’t have patience, and they don’t know how to compromise. When your life is full of ego, you will demand more respect. When you don’t get it, tension builds up.
Blind trust in relationships is dangerous. It has been seen so many times when someone from different religion cons another person in the name of marriage. I know of some gruesome cases as I am a fan of crime cases, but I will leave the details out of this article due to lack of space. But you will often see cases like women and children are being smuggled and being tortured. These types of unwanted events can only be avoided by creating awareness.
Feminism in today’s era is another fail, men and women are both victims of feminism. Because of feminist propagandas like equal rights and wage gap, women tend to believe that they can act like men. However, what they do not understand is that men and women are different. I have discussed this in detail in the psychology chapter later in this series. Women believe that they are discriminated against in the workplace when it comes to salary. They get paid low. But this is not true, most of the time women and men get the same salary in the same position in the same industry.
When women are less paid, it is because of their decision. They are more agreeable plus they tend to do jobs that pay less. On the other hand, women are more likely to be selected in the workplace, especially in lower-level jobs- this creates an employment issue for men. On the other hand, it is common sense that companies will of course hire candidates who are taking less money. So, between a negotiating man and an agreeable woman, the latter is the better choice to reduce operational cost.
On the other hand, for high level positions, companies need experienced people. Experienced people are those who have worked more and harder. Women, after a certain age, focus on family and neglect work- which is the most sensible thing to do based on their social roles. So, if a woman neglects work and another man is working hard- then the latter is the obvious choice.
So basically, many women are being blinded by the foolish propaganda; they are getting more opportunities in reality. But that does not mean that the outcome will be the same. Because the professional world is based on meritocracy (values merits). I have met many women who are still obnoxious about the fact that the wage gap is a myth. Even after showing all these facts, they blindly trust the propaganda of radical feminism.
Awareness comes from within but external influences and information can develop that awareness immensely. Most people are naive in this world; therefore, it is easy to program their mind. Malevolent people cause irreparable damage to this type of people. And this makes those naïve people cynical and question things- which is a good thing.
In your professional life, blind trust can reduce efficiency to say the least. Suppose you are the boss and you have trusted your team members blindly. Now they might take advantage and not work properly. You will lose money this way.
So, it is necessary to set clear expectations and guidelines. Regular communication is important. But try not to micromanage. It impacts the team member’s confidence level and irritates them. Then they will leave you due to frustration. Micromanage only if someone is underperforming and needs specific guidelines.
From the perspective of team members, you should not trust your boss or peers blindly. Many of you consider classmates as friends, and in some cases, it’s fine. But once you step out of the education field and join the corporate world, things change. Most of your peers would like to see you getting scolded by your boss.
I would mention a recent personal incident where I over-trusted a team member and suffered for it. We hired a website developer who took much more than market price to build a website. I believed that he had enough skills but got a very lousy looking half-website in 6 months. The user experience was not exciting there. One idiotic thing I did is that I pre-paid him the full amount before I got the whole deliverables. I pre-paid because I was convinced of his excuses and talents.
But the reality was something else. We had to start over developing the website again and it cost us efforts, money, time and users. I learned that there are people who are good at showmanship and at least in business, it is very hard to trust people.
I would also agree that I made mistakes- by not doing background research on the market price of website development or expected timeline. Though I did not have enough programming knowledge, these could have been done. So, another lesson for me was to increase my own knowledge.
Your boss is not fully trustworthy either. Good relationship between you and your boss will remain till the time you are performing well. His interest orients profit of the business. You may think that now you have a good relationship with your boss. And you might think that your boss will spare you if things go south. This is your stupidity.
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You are a victim of criticism from your childhood.
Everyone is a victim of criticism.
“You are fat”
“You are good for nothing”
“You call this a cooking, crap tastes better than this”
“If I could, I would have given this movie a negative star”
People get criticised for their appearance, behaviour, actions, opinions or something they haven’t even done.
And you can’t change this. You have criticised others yourself. This can’t be controlled.
What you can control is- your ability to handle criticism.
You need to handle criticism without taking it personally…. unless it is actually personal. And if it is personal, punch the critique and be happy. This is because you can’t satisfy everyone.
But normally, you should learn to smile, be content and let the grudges go. Criticism gives us an opportunity to learn.
When you are criticised, it can be a blessing in disguise because it can be a shortcoming you possess and could not identify till now. You need to fix that blind-spot if possible.
There are 2 things in a criticism- the tone and the suggestion. If you focus on the tone, you will not be able to improve because humans are slave of affection. If you don’t get affection, you will be sad.
Program yourself to neglect that part. Focus on the suggestion instead.
I know that it is easier said than done, but you can do it. Because I have done it.
I will give you a very recent example.
I am working on another project- Abtaran App Store, it’s a new app store in India, launched 2022 February.
From the first couple months, when we were doing marketing, we used this phrase “An Indian App Store”. Our idea was that Indians will be encouraged to join their native app store. Initially we thought of making our platform only for Indian app developers, our plan was to tap into foreign app developers’ market after some months. So, we thought this would be a good strategy to start with.
However, one day, I got a reply in the email and it told me to not waste time with this useless app store. Rather, I should make a great app store and tell Indians to use it proudly.
I was a bit sad and confused for a moment. I replied by saying thanks and asked for more feedback from the person.
Actually, in this world, people don’t like to give too much negative feedback to unknown people.
People like to be liked and do not want to show their actual feelings in most cases. Sometimes, they also deliberately avoid telling the negative points.
Anyway, I tried to analyse what the person actually wanted to say. His actual feedback was that we are portraying our project as an “INDIAN” project, Indian App Store. If we add a specific nationality in any business, there is a chance that other nationalities will not use it.
That will actually disbenefit the app developers who make international apps. Users from other countries will feel that only Indians are allowed to use this app store and they won’t be intrigued. Here, I tried to understand the motive of that feedback.
This was a blind-spot in our marketing strategy and we slightly modified it to “An App Store made in India” and “A New App Store for the World”. This way, the identified issue gets solved because the foreign users won’t think that they cannot use a thing made in India. So, apps made in any country will get international exposure on our platform. And simultaneously we started developing our global platform earlier than planned.
I was a bit biased in this case because the primary website was for only Indian apps, I did not want to change that fact or reveal my next steps.
Anyway, the point is to see criticisms from an objective viewpoint.
Your intention should be to do something good enough to make the critiques shut up.
This is what the players do.
The newspapers write that that player has nothing left to contribute. And in the next match the player scores a hattrick and comes in front of the camera and dances. The media postpones criticism.
The issue with humans is that we only value praise. Most praises are actually lies, flattery and useless.
If you already know that you are good at something, what will you do by listening to it again? This is why some girls don’t like being called ‘pretty’ or being proposed to by the same sentences again and again. It becomes cliché for them.
The culture is also another factor here. Indians don’t give negative feedback too much. The likability is one reason. Some people also carefully avoid giving constructive or negative feedback because they don’t want others to improve.
Then, there are some people who will criticize you just to ruin your mental peace. People with astrological signs Virgos are easy victims for those. I see my mother panicking all the time imagining weird scenarios. I make a poker face while seeing her expressions. #Indianmotherszindabaad
You must ignore false criticism. If someone is criticising you and you already know that it is wrong, show them proof once. Don’t get into arguments, and don’t reply immediately. Let them get angry because you are replying late.
Smile is a good tool to answer criticism. If you have confidence in yourself, just smile and avoid responding at all. Let them find the answers on their own.
If you want to criticise something or someone, make sure it is a valuable critique. Or else, it is useless and it will spread negativity.
Criticism should be actionable.
Here are some hacks about handling criticism-
When you are being criticised, don’t think if the critique is younger than you or below your social status or poor. Welcome any criticism that can add value to you and motivate you.
Another important thing about handling criticism is to stop whining. Give me some peace and stop complaining.
If you have any solution, then do it. Or else accept it and be silent. There is no other way to live a better life.
When you stop complaining, it adds to your positivity and miracles happen.
Understand that YOU TOO can make mistakes. Some critiques will be harsh, you might feel that it is unfair.
At that time, you have to channel that sadness and anger into your willpower to do better next time.
One nice way to handle criticism is to make jokes. Especially if the comment is not useful. Sarcasm is a very useful thing to stop unnecessary backlashes.
Someone criticizing you means that your work is getting noticed. Sometimes, it can be free publicity. It is a good thing, cheer up.
Also, if someone criticises you regarding something, don’t think that you have to abandon that thing. Like if you have made a game or produced a movie but it is not up to the mark. Get the criticism and either improve it or get onto the next project and make it grand. Each time you complete something, your confidence boosts.
If you are a very sensitive person with soft characters, criticism might be hard for you. But you can do it because your trust in yourself is bigger than those negative feedbacks. Just keep my words in mind.
Other skills like this that can improve your success mindset.
‘Food’ and ‘Life’… two unavoidable concepts we deal with everyday. The first one surely is many of yours’ favourite. Count me in. No matter what the mood is, sometimes all we want to do is eat, eat more, eat much more. I too enjoy tasty food like most of you do. Not sure if I can be called a foodie. But I surely lie somewhere in the foodie spectrum. Otherwise why would ‘Food’ take shape as a motivational entity in my ‘Life’?
Got puzzled? Okay, let me explain a crazy thought I got one day. I tried to simplify the mysterious concept we call LIFE with the help of FOOD. Trust me, no other analogy has kept me going through this messed up life more than this one. I say, Life is like a Buffet. A buffet filled with an infinite number of variety dishes. We have heard statements like “Life is a race”, “Life is a stage”, “Life is a game”. But have you heard “Life is a Buffet” before? To me this thought came off as really inspiring.
Simply picture a large variety of your favourite dishes; dishes that you have never seen before but look so good, dishes that have a fruit or vegetable which you hate, and of course creamy chocolate cakes, ice creams. You name it, everything you have seen & not seen is available in this massive buffet. Best part? You have the absolute liberty to pick anything you want.
As known, in a buffet there will be starters, main course and desserts. But do you assume anyone would mind if I start with desserts? Do you think it will be a terrible mistake to have only desserts in the buffet? Will I be punished for not touching the starter or main course? Of course not. I can simply choose to eat whatever I wish to & how much ever I want to. That freedom is huge. And I relate this idea of freedom to our life choices.
Now think of these tasty dishes as different paths in your life. The paths could be different turns you take in your life. It could mean different Career options, Personality types, people you choose to be with, the opportunities you get in life. It could mean anything, you can customise that idea in your suitable way. So this infinity of food items displayed before you is, in other terms, the countless possibilities with which you could design your life. Definitely you can’t try EVERYTHING that is on this massive buffet. But you can pick the food items that you feel would cater to your taste.
Sometimes life gets overwhelming for me. A lot of things to do, to take care of, another lot to pick & choose from. At such times, “Life is a Buffet” comes to my rescue. When I look at my life choices as delicious food items in a massive buffet, it helps me calm down. The idea creates an environment for my inner child to wonder at the world. This makes me feel a little more excited about decision making. This is how I relate LIFE to food, and conceive it as a joyful experience.
We all worry about our purpose in life. Some lucky souls have figured out their favourite dishes. Because they identified their taste in food. So they now have clarity as to what to choose. But some others haven’t figured out their taste. And the best way to know your taste is by exploring. By experiencing the flavour of as many dishes as you can. To remind you, the complete saying is: “A Jack of all trades is a master of none, but oftentimes better than a master of one.”
We come to this dining hall we call the Earth. We stay here only for one meal. Then leave when our time gets over. The time limit is exactly what makes this meal valuable. Try to pick your own variety of dishes. Doesn’t matter if it tastes good or bad. Remember, when you leave after your meal, you need to leave with a happy tummy.
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“If you want to run faster, run alone
If you want to run further, run with others”
– This is a quote I liked from social media.
Personally, I don’t like the concept of friendship. I never really had a good friend either.
And I don’t regret that. I enjoy spending time alone. For me, I am an amazing person to talk with myself.
I don’t say that I am a good friend. But I am an interesting stranger to you.
And I don’t consider women as friends. Boys and girls can’t be friends, they have not come on earth to be friends. Women are mothers/sisters/madams/supportive colleagues/lovers/strangers to me.
For men, I am ok with brotherhood rather than friendship.
But then, I need people’s help sometimes too. It does not mean I have to go to their home, massage their shoulders and chit chat.
Network is needed because you can’t do everything alone. Network is not synonymous to friendship. Friendship can be fake and a comforting lie.
Networking is about building rapport so that you can get benefits from others and also support others. It is more professional and the chance of making someone feel sad by rejection is low. Because the attachment string is light. What I mean is, if someone in your network refuses to give you a favour, then you will not be much dissatisfied.
On the other hand, in friendship, attachment strings may be high and therefore, if there is a disagreement, the level of dissatisfaction will be higher. And relationships may be damaged. Remember that time when your friend asked you for something and you had to give it though you did not want to? It is simply due to emotional attachment.
Thus, building a network is better than making friends.
Everyone acts based on some self-interest. The key is to create value by giving and taking something.
I am a straight-forward person when it comes to asking for help. And when someone asks me for help, I like it when that person comes to the point fast.
But politeness and rationality matters.
Anyway, let’s talk about networking.
You might know at least one person who has failed school but still, is making a lot of money and also has power. Some politicians are good examples of this.
The way they have achieved this is with networking.
In business, there is a term called ‘conversion rate’. It is used in the sales field. Conversion rate is the percent of consumers buying something out of total people asked to buy.
If you ask more people, your chance of selling increases.
And if you ask people you know, that chance increases. Simply because people who know you, will buy from you just because there is a factor of TRUST.
Trust is very important in the case of getting a favour.
Some people also buy just because they can’t say ‘no’ to people they know.
The point is, you should build your network.
Be on good terms with people.
Be helpful to others.
Be a good source of knowledge. Then people will come back to you again and again.
To build a good network, you have to learn to GIVE first.
Give respect …. Give support …. Give knowledge …. Be a source.
This is how you will be a dependable person, someone who can be trusted. Be genuine in this.
If you don’t know something, direct them to some other source.
There are many so-called social media influencers. But there are few influencers who have been doing good and growing gradually. The reason is that they add value to our lives.
I would like to mention some of my favourite YouTube channels of 2022. These have been good sources of knowledge to me.
CodeWithHarry (I designed the primary BlogSutram website with his tutorial)
Warikoo (writer of ‘Do Epic Shit’ and who inspired me to write these book)
Intellectual Indies, Josh talks, Raj Shamani, Think School, Backstage with Millionaires, TedX Talks, Convey by FinnovationZ (business knowledge and news, learned more than my MBA here)
Create Quantum Wealth (interesting)
Abtaran India (official YouTube channel of Abtaran App Store where we post interesting contents)
Pranjal Kamra, Bekifaayati, Josh Money (Finance knowledge)
FitTuber (health habits)
Seeken (book summaries)
Mystery of Crypto, MoneyZG, Whiteboard Crypto (Cryptocurrency knowledge and news)
Jordan B. Peterson, FreshandFit (psychology and personal development)
AstroKapoor, Conscience and Rupen R Shah (interesting astrological insights)
Young Moves Media, The Festival of Bharat, An Open Letter, String, AKTK, (a lot of unknown history and happenings of India)
FlexiTricks & Mera Template (learned a lot about app business)
Network can be a very dangerous tool as well. Once you get a high number of followers, you can also brainwash and mislead them to support your propaganda. And this is not a new thing…. Many leaders do that.
But you have to start with adding value to the people in some way or another.
When you start giving, without the expectation of getting anything, you may only receive poison and criticism at start. But DON’T give up.
Move forward with your willpower as strong as steel.
Any person who has achieved success, could not do it without sacrificing, sweating and shedding tears.
In the era of the digital world, it is easier to build your network through social media. Join LinkedIn, create content on YouTube, you will be known to others.
You might be liked by some, hated by some, ignored by many. But still, something is better than nothing in this case.
If you think that you would avoid social media, be my guest. I don’t like it myself. And actually, there are many ways to build your network offline. You just haven’t looked into that.
Some ways to build network offline can be:
Networking offline is actually easier than online networking. Everyone is busy checking out likes and comments. If you can be different, that will be interesting.
Going and talking with people takes confidence. It is not about introverts or extroverts. It is about going out of the comfort zone.
You can be an extrovert, but still be boring. You can be introverted but still have good communication skills.
I have actually approached strangers many times. Though it does not make me special.
I have talked with complete stranger girls in public places. Before talking every time, my heart beats so fast. But I take deep breaths and tell myself- “what will happen at most… she will ignore me and go away”. And then I go and start a conversation. The percentage of me getting an impolite reply from a stranger girl is 0%. Girls feel enchanted, sometimes shy; but never talk badly. People with panic attacks may act differently.
This boosts confidence and testosterone. Next time it is easier for me to approach another stranger.
On the other hand, when strangers approach me, I like that as well. I behave politely.
Try it, you’ll be fine, pinkie promise.
When you build your network, your trustworthiness increases. And you will be nearer to success when asking for a favour.
Your network also represents your reputation.
Try not doing anything that impacts the reputation. Then you might have to start from scratch again.
Persuasion is the technique to level up your networking skills. It is also a part of negotiation.
When you negotiate, you discuss things to come to a conclusion. And when you persuade, you make others think like you and make them agree to your conclusion.
I really like Robert Cialdini’s persuasion techniques in this aspect. He talked about 6 points regarding influencing people.
Not all of these can be used in every type of conversation. But in business or negotiation, these are very useful.
A salesperson’s work is to turn a ‘no’ to ‘yes’ from a consumer. For that, they need to identify different loopholes the consumer can find out. And then they prepare convincing answers to show that the benefits outweigh the disadvantages. Or they logically negate the confusion of the consumers.
A small tip is that if you use ‘because’ in your conversation while asking something, you are likely to get success. This is because people like to see you prove yourself.
You also need to shut up and listen to the other person before you negotiate and persuade. Because you need to analyse how to convince the other person to agree to your terms.
When you build your network and persuade them properly, you can achieve a lot.
One interesting thing is that- stereotypes may reduce your rate of success. People can be racist and closed-minded. And influencing them is not easy.
You are not an ice cream so don’t expect everyone to like you.
Communication style, body language, and behaviour are some things that can help you increase your chance of success with these people.
Some tips related to this aspect are:
Practice these and you can be a leader in any field.
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